Chapter 1: A Request

“You have to be there! You promised!”

Ethan Wolfe tried not to wince. It was amazing how much energy a seven-year-old could have, especially one who had braces on her legs and needed crutches to get around. Smiling, he reached over and ruffled her short blonde hair. He’d been so glad to find he could fit in as well here as he had back home. Aria was his only charge at the group home, but he was welcome there even when he wasn’t helping her. Ethan shifted his hold on her, shifting her more comfortably onto his hip, as he carried her down towards the small stable at the bottom of the hill.

“And I will,” Ethan assured her. “If twenty-degree weather couldn’t keep me away, the threat of a little rain won’t, either.”

“I’m going to show everyone how well I can ride,” Aria insisted. “Jill said she’d try to find someone with a video camera so she could tape it for me!”

“Not that I don’t think this is great, Ari,” Ethan said, “but couldn’t you have waited until it got a little warmer to do this?”

Aria gave him an indignant look. “I’ll take that for a no,” Ethan thought, fighting a smile. He could understand why she was so enthusiastic; she no longer needed his help to control her pony. Still, she’d decided that she’d show everyone else in the group home on the day of her birthday. Current weather predictions insisted there would be rain, which was bad enough. But Aria had also decided she wanted to have a tape of her achievements, too. The group home couldn’t afford things like a camcorder. The stable and the few ponies belonged to the people who owned the land and buildings. They lent use of the ponies and the building, but they didn’t pay for anything the home needed.

Ethan knew someone who might be willing to lend a camcorder; at least, he hoped so. She wasn’t his friend; she was his cousin Alanna’s friend, but maybe she would help. In all honesty, he didn’t like the impression he’d gotten from her. The redhead was too outgoing and flirtatious, and his brother and sister had told him they got the impression she was promiscuous, too. Ethan didn’t like promiscuous women, but when he’d mentioned this worry to Bailey, his sister had read him the riot act. I know I shouldn’t judge, he thought, sighing inwardly. It’s just...

“Ethan!” Aria punched him in the shoulder, although it didn’t really hurt. “You’re staring off into space again. Are you thinking about your girlfriend?”

“I don’t have a girlfriend, Ari,” Ethan told her, keeping his voice patient. “I’ve told you that.”

“I know,” Aria said, lifting her chin. “You wouldn’t two-time me; you’re too nice for that.”

Ethan managed not to laugh. Aria was one of the most precocious children he’d ever met; sometimes too precocious. It’s a good thing she’s turning eight rather than eighteen, he thought, or she’d want to start dating me as a birthday present. Smiling to himself, he reached up and pushed the barn door open. Ethan set Aria down on a large tack box nearby one of the stalls, then went to ready the pony.

“I wanted to help,” Aria complained, as he led Spots out into the aisle.

“It’s too cold, sweetheart,” Ethan told her. “I shouldn’t even be doing this. Jill will murder me when she finds out.”

Spots was a fat, furry pony, but he wasn’t temperamental in the way of most ponies. He didn’t really have spots, either; they were more like splotches, white and orangey brown, marking him as a skewbald. Ethan brushed the pony down, then saddled and bridled him. He set Aria on the pony’s back before releasing him from the crossties, then clipped a leadshank onto Spot’s bridle and led him outside.

He didn’t mind the cold so much, but he wished Aria hadn’t insisted upon going out. The last thing he wanted was for her to get sick. Granted, she was bundled up enough for two children, but he worried anyway. His sisters were always telling him he worried too much. “I’m their brother, after all,” Ethan thought, smiling wryly. “I’m supposed to worry about them, or what good would I be?” But maybe he really did worry too much. Since his parents had passed away, it was up to him to keep watch over his family.

---

It was getting late when Ethan finally reached the house of his cousin, Gabriel. It was their family night, and although he didn’t generally join in, he knew that Bea was there often enough. He didn’t know her car, so he couldn’t tell if it was there. The front door was left unlocked, so Ethan simply walked in. It was warm and bright, and friendly conversation spilled from the dining room. He pulled off his coat and left it on a hook by the door, then stepped into the dining room.

Two seats were empty, plates still sitting on the table; Sydney and Elijah must have been doing their homework. “There are too many of us,” Ethan thought. “It was part of the reason he never attended. But Bea was there, sitting next to Alanna and speaking quietly with her and her boyfriend, Drake.”

She was really pretty, actually. Her hair was a brilliant red in color, hanging just below her shoulders, her skin was the typical alabaster of a redhead, and her eyes were soft jade green. Not to mention she had a killer figure, and there had been a time when Ethan could have really appreciated that. Those days are gone,” he thought, shaking his head. “And there’s no way I’d ever go back to that. Not after what had happened.”

“Well, look who’s here,” Gabriel’s wife, Aislinn, teased. Her pale blue eyes were lit with warmth. “Would you like some dessert, Ethan?”

“Don’t say no,” Gabriel put in, smiling as well. “You’ll regret it, believe me.”

“Actually, I don’t really have time,” Ethan said quietly. “I just wanted to see if Bea was here. I needed to ask her something.”

She looked up at him, obviously startled. Bea looked away, and he thought she might have been blushing. Nah, Ethan thought, women like that don’t blush. She did rise from the chair, however, and, flashing a small smile, headed into the living room. He followed, wondering yet again why she seemed to dislike him so much. Bea had a bright, nearly flirtatious smile for everyone-except him. She doesn’t even know me, Ethan thought, but for some reason she doesn’t like me.

She dropped down onto the couch, pulling her legs up beneath her and smoothing down the long white skirt she was wearing. Bea was also wearing a large, oversized, ribbed green sweater. It was odd to see her in something so ... chaste-looking. Ethan settled in the armchair across from the couch.

“I needed to ask for a favor,” he explained to her questioning look.

Bea’s eyebrows rose. “From me?”

“Well, yes,” Ethan said. He shifted uncomfortably. “It’s for one of the children at the group home. She’s been learning to ride, you see, and she can do it on her own now. She wants to show everybody.”

“What do you need me for?” Bea asked, her expression still wary.

“She wants a tape of it as a memory,” Ethan replied, smiling sheepishly. “Ari is doing so well ... a few years ago the doctors said she would never be able to walk without her braces, but now they think she’ll be strong enough someday.”

He realized, belatedly, that Bea knew nothing about Aria. At least, he’d never told her. But she was smiling in a warm, tender way that brought him to a surprised halt. Most people, especially women, did perk up when he mentioned that he worked with disabled children. Usually it was just the human need to be nosy, which drove Ethan crazy. But he reminded himself that Bea was friends with the Wolfe family; Gabriel worked with children too, so she had to be used to it.

“You want to borrow my camcorder, right?” Bea asked.

Ethan frowned. “Well, um ... if you have time to show me how to use it...”

“Well, you must have used one before,” Bea said, smiling teasingly. “Who hasn’t?”

“Me,” he answered, chagrined. “Ah, look ... the home can’t afford their own ... but this is really important to Ari...”

“I’ll help you,” Bea assured him. “Believe me, if I can’t teach you to use this thing, no one can.”

Well, that’s the hard part, Ethan thought, sighing. He pushed his hair back from his face as he considered what exactly to say. The problem was that he didn’t exactly have a lot of spare time between now and Aria’s birthday. He’d pledged some extra hours to the home this week, and there were his usual charges, he’d promised to help Sydney with her latest essay for her college prep class ... and that was the tip of the iceberg. Ethan was used to being busy, but even for him, this was a little too much.

---

The day was dim and gray, and freezing cold. Another beautiful day in the life of Beatrice Johansen, she thought, sighing heavily. ‘My fingers feel like Popsicles!’ But her gloves were too heavy and she wouldn’t be able to use her camcorder with them on. ‘I know I promised Ethan I’d be here,’ Bea thought, ‘I’m just not sure why I promised. It was hard enough being around him, with those dark eyes and his constant disapproving looks. He’d just seemed so enthusiastic,’ she couldn’t say no.

It would have been easier if he’d just learned to use the damn thing himself, but he’d been too busy. Which was why Bea was making her way down to a rickety old barn, on a freezing cold day in the dead of winter, with the clouds above so swollen and gray that it was bound to rain at any moment. This can’t be good for my camcorder, she thought, resting her hand on the carrying case thumping against her hip with each step. She should have said no, but he had that smile characteristic of Wolfe males, the one that made it impossible to refuse.

There was a good dozen children lined up on the fence, ranging in age from five to fourteen. Ethan was in the paddock, helping a young blonde girl onto the back of one of the shaggiest, fattest ponies Bea had ever seen. Grinning despite herself, she opened her case and had her camcorder out by the time she reached the fence. There was another woman there too, a brunette, probably only a few years older than she herself was.

“Your friend is here, Ethan,” the woman called.

Ethan turned, leading the pony up to the fence. The cold hardly seemed to bother him at all, it seemed. His hair was pulled back out of his face and his scarf simply hung around his shoulders. The girl on the pony was bundled up like a marshmallow. That has to be Aria, Bea thought. She stepped up onto the fence, holding her camera up.

“Is this your girlfriend, Ethan?” the girl, Aria, asked, when they reached the fence.

Ethan let out a long-suffering sigh. “No, Ari.”

“Why not?” Aria frowned, her lower lip sticking out in a petulant pout. “She’s really pretty.”

“So um ... uh, should we get started?” Bea interrupted. She could feel her cheeks heating.

Ethan handed the reins to Aria, then stepped up against the fence. Bea turned her camcorder on, fiddling quickly with its plethora of special features to counter the bleakness of the day. I should have known that this would be like this, she thought, lifting the camcorder. I should have realized I’d end up embarrassed somehow. It wasn’t really Aria’s fault, of course, but that didn’t make it less embarrassing.

“I can’t decide,” Ethan said, “if she wants to date me herself or marry me off.”

Bea laughed hesitantly. “She’s ... really cute...”

She listened as he talked about Aria’s progress in the few months he’d known her. The little girl could steer the pony, although she needed rein commands to do it. Still, Bea was impressed by Aria’s determination and her patience. The pony was not happy about being out in this weather and balked continually, but the girl simply urged him on, speaking softly and patting his neck until he started walking again. I guess this must be a rewarding career, Bea thought, because it’s probably really discouraging at times, too, but Ethan doesn’t give up.

There was intense silence while the girl rode, but they all broke out into cheers when she trotted the pony a good ten steps before stopping. Bea, watching through the camcorder, had to bite her lip. She couldn’t imagine what it would be like to be overjoyed by what so many would see as a small achievement. God bless her, she thought, smiling to herself. At that age, I would have probably given up.

A few others came to join them, including two other staff members, a man and a woman. Aria was just finishing her ride when a loud disturbance down at the end of the fence made Bea jump. She nearly fell off the fence, but Ethan grabbed her wrist, keeping her from going over. A moment later, he was sprinting down the length of the fence to see what was wrong. Bea took a moment to secure her camcorder, then followed. Not that there’s anything I could do to help, anyway, she thought.

The brunette woman-she was pretty certain her name was Jill-was kneeling in the grass, trying to comfort a crying girl. The girl was younger than Aria by at least a couple of years. She had dark hair in two braided pigtails, but that was all Bea could see because she’d buried her face against her hands. The other woman, a blonde, and the man, a mostly nondescript fellow with dull brown hair and a beaky nose, stood behind Jill, looking concerned.

“Ellery, sweetie, what’s wrong?” Jill asked, her voice low and soothing.

Ethan slid between the fence and crouched beside Jill. “What happened?”

“I have no clue,” Jill told him. “Ugh ... Ethan, help Aria with the pony. Kate, Roger, get the others inside. I have to take Ellery in.”

“I can take her,” Roger offered.

Ellery wailed louder, startling them all, and Jill shook her head. She lifted the girl with surprising ease and began trotting up the hill towards the main building. Kate and Roger began rounding up the other children, but Ethan went to Aria and started leading the pony towards the barn. Bea, uncertain what else to do, followed him. The barn, despite smelling of horse and manure, was at least warm.

Maybe it’s just me, Bea thought, but something about that was frighteningly familiar ... She sat down on a large chest near one of the stalls and watched Ethan help the little girl with the pony. Aria had developed a method, leaning heavily on one crutch to free up a hand with which to brush the pony. Bea fiddled with her camcorder case, feeling terribly unsettled. Maybe I’m just overreacting, she thought, shaking her head. It’s been a very long time since I’ve really been around small children, after all.

“I’m sorry about that,” Ethan said to her, when they were finally walking back up the hill, Aria trundling along clumsily a few feet ahead of them.

“Is ... is she okay?” Bea asked.

Ethan shrugged. “I don’t really know. I only really work with Aria. From what Jill’s told me, Ellery has only been here maybe eight months. Apparently, she’s always been high-strung like this.”

“She um ... she didn’t really seem to ... like Roger...” Bea said hesitantly.

“She doesn’t like anyone when she’s in that mood,” Ethan told her. He paused a moment, turning to look at her. “Her parents were killed in a plane crash not long ago. She was an only child, and really spoiled, from what I understand. I’m sure after she’s been here a little longer, she’ll be fine.”

He’s right, Bea thought. I’m just letting my imagination get away with me. She was probably just nervous and jumpy, being around him like this. Ethan didn’t seem to like her very much, and she never knew what to say to him. I should just get going, she decided, setting her camcorder case more comfortably on her shoulder. Bea started to turn away, to head towards her car, but Ethan grabbed her wrist, bringing her to a halt. She turned to him and found her knees going weak beneath that male Wolfe smile.

“Thanks for doing this for me,” Ethan said quietly. “And for Ari. I know it means a lot to her.”

Bea smiled. “Happy to help,” she told him. “I’ll get this transferred onto VHS for you and have Alanna get it to you as soon as possible.”

“You can find me here on Fridays,” Ethan said. “Just bring it here. I’m sure Ari will want to watch it right away.”

Bea nodded. She was aware that her heart was pounding, and she couldn’t seem to talk around it. This is just stupid, she thought, as she headed back to her car. He doesn’t even like me! And she wasn’t sure she liked him, beyond a physical attraction. When she saw him like this, working with children, Bea found him incredibly charming. But Ethan was so strict and so unforgiving about too many things. He refused to go watch his sister, Sydney, dance, because he didn’t approve of the type of dancing.

How do you become such a prude at that age? Bea wondered. She put her camcorder case in the backseat of her car, then slipped into the driver’s seat. As soon as she had the key in the ignition, fat drops of rain began splattering her windshield. Oh, just lovely, she thought, as she started up the car. Maybe I’m just feeling sorry for myself, but on days like this, life seems to be taking a turn for the bleak.

Chapter 2: Girl Talk

Sada and Alastair’s home was small but cozy, and Bea was rather fond of it. She sank down onto one of the big, black couches, resting on pillows patterned in blue and green; a Christmas present from Alanna and Drake. The living room was growing noisy as Bailey and Sydney filed through the door, carrying backpacks and sleeping bags. They’d decided to have a Girls’ Night, all six of them. Aislinn had declined, since with Sydney and Elijah out of the house for the night, she got some time alone with Gabriel.

Somehow, Bea couldn’t help feeling a little out of place. “I’m the only one here who isn’t one of the family,” she realized. Although Sada kept her maiden name for dancing and Xandri kept hers--Saint-Angelus, now--for photography, tonight they were all Wolfe women. Except her. Bea wondered idly what Alanna would do when she married Drake. Knowing her friend, she would probably keep her maiden name. “I don’t know of anyone who’s met the Wolfes,” she thought, “who didn’t want to be one of them.”

“I swear, I’m getting so sick of it!” Sydney was saying, as she stripped out of her coat, gloves, and scarf. “At least I’ve found something I love! The least he could do is be happy for me!”

“I’m sure he’ll come around in time, Syn,” Bailey soothed. “Ethan is our brother. Yes, he may well need that stick surgically removed from his ass, but he’s still our brother and he loves us.”

He’s still harping on about that? Bea thought, frowning. She smiled at Sydney and Bailey as they dropped down onto the loveseat at the other end of the couch. Xandri and Alanna came out of the kitchen, carrying mugs of hot chocolate. Despite feeling out of place, Bea knew this would be a wonderful evening. She’d never before had the chance to spend time with all of them at once. And maybe I can help cheer Sydney up,” she thought. After all, she knew what it’s like to be on the other end of Ethan’s disapproval.

“I was thinking of ordering pizza,” Sada said when they’d all settled down. She was sitting in the armchair, her hands folded on her belly. “I have this insane craving for Hawaiian pizza... someone share with me?”

“At least she isn’t requesting anchovies,” Bea said, grinning. “I like Hawaiian pizza, Sadie. I’ll have some with you.”

“Hopefully, it will be a while before the weird cravings hit,” Sada said, frowning. “I’ve still got another five months to go.”

That hadn’t stopped her from taking to overlarge, baggy clothing, though. The emerald green sweatshirt she was wearing hid her growing belly. She’d also been growing her hair out for a while now, and it hung below her shoulders. Bea had asked Sada once why she’d begun growing it out. Sada had shown her pictures of her own mother, nine months pregnant, with black hair all the way down to her thighs. It was such a silly, sentimental thing, she’d said.

It wasn’t until the pizza arrived that they really got started. Xandri got paper plates and napkins, and Alanna got cans of soda. Sada complained about not being allowed to do anything until the pizza boxes had been opened and the food caught her attention. That ended up being the first thing they talked about: how much Alastair was driving her crazy.

“Herc is less annoying,” Sada complained. “And he barks most of the day!”

“If I ever get Quinn a pet,” Xandri said, “he’d best name it something better than Hercules!”

Bea laughed. “As if Quinn would allow a pet in his apartment! Risk something messing up his perfect apartment? Never!”

“Sounds like Ethan,” Bailey put in, rolling her eyes. “And Gavin, too. He’s such a neat freak. Perversely, Chase is a lazy slob.”

They all laughed at that. Bea hadn’t really gotten to know any of the new male Wolfes all that well. She’d talked to Elijah a few times, though; he seemed to have developed a small crush on her, which was both amusing and flattering. He’ll get over it, she thought, reaching for another slice of pizza. He must have girls all over him in school. Sydney made some comments to that effect from time to time.

“You know, Conner keeps asking about you, Syn,” Sada said, grinning at Sydney. “He’s Forrester’s boy...”

Sydney wrinkled her nose. “He’s kind of annoying... He’s always watching me! What is with that?”

“Maybe he needs to get laid,” Bailey teased, nudging her sister playfully. When Sydney turned red, Bailey put an arm around her sister’s shoulders, laughing. “Syn is such a good, sweet girl. Doesn’t even hold hands.”

“That’s because Ethan knows how to handle a shotgun,” Sydney muttered, her cheeks growing even redder.

And to think, I used to want sisters, Bea thought, grinning herself. She liked Bailey and Sydney. It was surprisingly easy to talk about this sort of thing, with all of them. Bailey refused to talk about her love life, merely flashing a small, secretive smile. Xandri talked a little bit about life with Quinn, when urged, and Alanna had no problem gushing about her relationship with Drake. Watching her eyes light up as she spoke, Bea felt a little sad, as much as she wanted to be happy for her friend.

It wasn’t easy, pushing aside years of feelings. Once she’d thought it would be easy, but Bea had been suffering some depression of late. Some of it was jealousy, although she wasn’t certain what she was jealous of--that Drake had Alanna, or that Alanna had Drake. She’s happier than she’s ever been, Bea thought glumly. Happier than I ever made her.

“Why the hell is my sex life so fascinating?” Xandri demanded, after Sada had asked her another question.

Sada pouted. “Because I don’t currently have one!” She huddled down in the chair, her arms around her belly. “He tells me it’s not because I’m putting on weight, but...”

Bea snorted. “You’d have to put on about a hundred pounds or so before it would start to bother Alastair.”

Sada gave her an odd look at that. Maybe I shouldn’t have said that, Bea thought, biting her lip. Even Alanna didn’t know about that time. But now they were all looking at her curiously. No good can come of this, she thought, wincing. I’m not stupid; I know how bad it sounds. She’d come clean to Xandri about her relationship with Quinn. But it was only one time! Bea thought, straightening in her chair. It was only one time, and it was before Sada even knew him!

“It was ... kind of an accident...” she said out loud.

Sada’s eyebrows rose. “An accident?”

“It was just after that ... fiasco with Melissa,” Bea explained. Back when she’d still been much more on the chubby side than she’d been comfortable with.

“That wasn’t that long after you met us,” Alanna said, frowning. “You were only, what ... sixteen?”

“Thereabouts,” Bea admitted, fidgeting uncomfortably in her chair. “Look, it ... you guys had that family showing in Italy ... and Alastair stayed home. He was ... well, he seemed so lonely...” She’d hated seeing him like that; he’d been so cheerful before. “I um ... well, I went over there to hang out. We picked the lock on the liquor cabinet and um ... well, if it makes you feel any better, I wasn’t allowed back in the house for months.”

“So that’s why Dad was so pissed off,” Alanna said.

It had been Aislinn who had actually been the one to bar her from the house. It had taken a long time to convince her that Alanna wouldn’t follow in Bea’s footsteps. She’d avoided the house for those months, making a lot of excuses, until Aislinn had come to her suddenly and apologized. She had always suspected that Alastair had said something to his mother. And Gabriel...

Gabriel had never even mentioned it. As protective as he was of his children, he realized that she was still little more than a child herself. Although Bea had never actually told him anything about her life, he always seemed understanding. In fact, he’d been much more angry at Alastair, who should have known better. He was mad about that for more than a month, Bea thought, fighting a smile. I felt more like he was my father than Alastair’s.

“Look, can we um ... I don’t want to talk about this anymore,” Bea said quietly. “I know what people think of me as it is...”

“Well, I don’t care,” Alanna said stubbornly. “And you know I never have. That stuff is all in the past.”

“Besides,” Bailey put in. “it makes Ethan squirm, which is always fun.”

“My past?” Bea asked, her eyebrows raising.

“He’s attracted to you,” Sydney explained. She scowled. “Of course he won’t admit it, because if he does, then he becomes an even bigger hypocrite!”

“Why don’t you talk to him?” Sada suggested.

“Because I want to tell him he’s an obnoxious ass!” Sydney explained. “But then he’ll be angry at me...”

I forgot what it was like to be a teenager, Bea thought, rubbing her head. She didn’t want to think about the possibility of Ethan being attracted to her. He certainly didn’t act like it, after all. Maybe I’ll talk to him, she thought, since it won’t make a difference if he’s angry at me. Besides, she had to bring that tape to him. Friday, Bea decided, she’d talk to him.

---

“So am I going to get my tape soon?”

Ethan turned back to Aria. She sat on her bed, toying with the bright pink mane of the toy pony he’d given her for her birthday. He’d been hoping Bea would bring the tape today, but she hadn’t shown up. What did I expect? he thought, sighing. Why did I get it in my head that she cared? Ethan smiled brightly, hoping to reassure Aria. The poor girl had suffered enough disappointment in her life.

“I’ll get it for you,” he promised her. “As long as you promise to rest. You did a lot today.”

Aria smiled. “I will, Ethan.”

It was later than it usually was when he left. Ethan made his way past the other rooms, trying to be quiet; it was reading hour. He paused outside Ellery’s room and peered inside. She wasn’t reading, though. She sat on the floor with her legs tucked behind her, dipping her fingers into jars of fingerpaints. The paper in front of her was covered with dark smears, red and black and murky brown. I should talk to Jill about getting her a psychologist, Ethan thought, frowning. She should have had emergency services when her parents died.

Jill was going over their expenses for the month at the moment, though, so he didn’t bother her. Instead, he retrieved his coat and headed outside. It was dark, nearly pitch, and freezing cold. Not far from his car was, much to his surprise, Bea’s. She leaned against it, holding a tape in one hand. She looked kind of ... out of it, Ethan thought, as he approached her. There were dark circles beneath her eyes, and her lashes fluttered as though she was struggling to keep her eyes open.

“Sorry I didn’t get here sooner,” Bea said, stifling a yawn. “Tape gave me a little trouble ... but I got it done.”

“Thanks, Ethan said, taking the tape. “Um ... do you need money or something...?

Bea shook her head. “No, don’t worry about it.” She paused for a moment, frowning thoughtfully, then added, “But I would like to talk to you. About your sister.”

“Which one?” Ethan asked, frowning.

“Sydney,” Bea replied. “Look, I know it’s none of my business but ... well...”

You’re damn right it isn’t your business, Ethan thought, his frown changing to a scowl. Bea stuttered to a halt, her expression becoming uncertain. He hoped she’d leave it be, but she drew herself up, squaring her shoulders and lifting her chin like a woman going into battle. Why is everyone on the planet sticking their nose into our business? Ethan wondered. At least Gabriel is family! But she ... she’s just some ... woman!

“Don’t even start,” he growled. “It is none of your business! And I don’t want you hanging around my sisters, anyway!”

Bea bristled, her eyes narrowing on him. “And why not?” she demanded.

“I know what type of person you are,” Ethan said, folding his arms across his chest. “Drinking and sex ... Sydney’s told me all about it!”

He really wasn’t expecting her reaction. The anger faded from her eyes, leaving them sorrowful and hurt. She turned away, but not before he’d seen that faint wet sheen over those soft jade eyes. Damnit! Ethan thought, reaching out and grabbing her arm. I didn’t mean to ... damnit! This was not what he’d meant to do at all. Bea pulled away from him, reaching for the door of her car. She was so upset that she was shaking, and he wasn’t about to let her drive off that way.

“Listen, please,” Ethan pleaded, forcing her to face him. “I didn’t mean that the way it sounded ... I just ... Sydney is my sister.” She wouldn’t look at him. “She thinks ... well, she’s got it into her head that I um ... that I’m attracted to you, which ... I mean, no offense, I’m just not ... um...”

“Attracted to promiscuous women,” Bea finished for him, her voice soft and full of scorn.

She looked up at him and suddenly Ethan realized what he was doing. He had her pinned against the car, his hands around her wrists, his body against hers in a way that was decidedly intimate. Except that the look in her eyes made him feel like he was the one who’d done something wrong. Ethan released her, stumbling back. He hadn’t imagined any woman could look so hurt and angry, even his sisters. Maybe I did do something wrong, he thought.

“She’s my sister,” Ethan repeated. “She was just ... just trying to look out for me. She didn’t mean anything by it...” He sighed. “And I’m just trying to look out for her. Like ... like Gabriel does for his children.”

Bea’s eyes narrowed suddenly, dangerously. “Don’t,” she growled. “Don’t you dare! I ... I thought maybe because you looked so much like him ... I thought maybe you might be the same.” Her voice shook with anger. “Gabriel is a good man ... he doesn’t judge people for what they’ve done in their past. You ... you’re not like him! Don’t you dare compare yourself to him!”

Bea whirled and got into her car. Ethan could do nothing but stare as she started it up and drove off. He’d seen feminine anger--Bailey and Sydney were frightening when they were furious with him--but never before had he experienced that. Not that I was ever Mr. Suave, he thought, turning back to the home, but I thought I was a little better with women than that. Ethan looked down at the tape in his hands and decided he might as well bring it to Aria.

She isn’t being fair, he thought, scowling. I’m allowed to be attracted--or not attracted--to whoever I want! He couldn’t help being a little jealous of his cousins, with their wonderful wives. Alastair talked often about his sweet Sada and although Quinn was quieter, there was no mistaking what a wonderful woman he had in Xandri. There is nothing wrong with wanting that, Ethan thought stubbornly. She scolds me for judging her, but she does the same thing to me!

Aria was reading when he came back to her room. She looked up at the sound of his voice and her eyes lit up as they always did.

“I thought you left,” Aria said, struggling to get to her feet.

“You promised to rest,” Ethan reminded her. “Sit down, I’ve got something for you.”

“Is it my tape?” Aria asked, bouncing excitedly.

He sat down on the end of the bed and handed the tape to her. Her excitement made him feel a little bit better, at least. Maybe I should apologize, Ethan thought, sighing inwardly. I mean, she did bring me the tape. Still, why should he apologize for his beliefs? He realized that Aria was watching him intently, her eyes wide in that unnerving, perceptive way that children had.

“Where’s Bea?” she asked. “She brought the tape, didn’t she? Why didn’t she come and see me?”

Damnit, Ethan thought. “It ... it’s not you, Ari,” he assured her. “She um ... she just couldn’t stay...”

“You did something to hurt her feelings,” Aria decided. “Ethan, what did you do?”

“Nothing!” he said defensively. “I mean ... maybe ... I don’t know! Since when did you become Dear Laura?”

Aria rolled her eyes. “You must have done something, otherwise you wouldn’t have reacted like that.”

How do children get that way? he wondered, staring at her. They see so much clearer than grown-ups. Maybe Aria was right. Ethan didn’t really want to think about it at the moment. He got the T.V. cart instead and put the tape in for Aria to watch. Great taping, he mused, from where he sat, in a chair in the corner. The picture is very clear, even though it was such an ugly day. Glancing at Aria, seeing the delight on her face, Ethan found himself smiling. At least the night hadn’t turned out all bad.

Chapter 3: Making Amends

“You’re supposed to be family! What right do you have, saying such things?!”

Ethan halted in the doorway of the Wolfe house, uncertain. Steeling himself, he stepped inside. Alanna and Sydney were in the living room. Although Syn was taller than her cousin by several inches at least, she shrank away beneath the older woman’s wrath. What is going on here? he wondered, frowning. Although he’d rather stare down the barrel of a gun, Ethan put himself between Sydney and Alanna, bringing his cousin to a surprised halt.

“You!” she growled, her eyes narrowing on him.

This was a bad idea, Ethan decided. He forced a smile to his face and said, “Look, let’s leave Syn out of this, all right?”

“No,” Alanna said, folding her arms across her chest. “She’s the one who was talking trash about my friend.”

“I didn’t mean it that way!” Sydney protested. “Honestly, I didn’t!”

Ethan turned to look at his sister. She did look genuinely upset; tears glittered in her dark eyes and her lower lip trembled in that way that told him the floodgates were close to opening. Sydney had become oddly emotional in certain circumstances--and oddly unemotional in others--since their parents’ accident. I’m going to need a miracle to get through this alive, Ethan thought. He did believe that Sydney hadn’t meant to be hurtful, but she seemed to have the same foot-in-mouth problem that he did.

Turning back to Alanna was the last thing he wanted to do, but he did it anyway. She doesn’t know, he thought, so of course she can’t understand. Sydney was just looking out for me. Ethan really wasn’t about to drudge up his past so his cousin could understand why he didn’t approve of Bea. It wasn’t any of her business, anyway.

“I don’t think Sydney meant anything by it,” Ethan said. “Honestly ... she’s a good kid, Alanna.”

“Maybe she didn’t,” Alanna said, her eyes narrowing on him. “But you did! Who the hell are you to judge her?”

“Look, I ... I didn’t mean ... it’s not like that,” Ethan stammered. “It’s ... it’s nothing against her personally ... I just...”

Hoo boy, he thought, I need to quit while I’m ahead. He wanted to explain to Alanna that he didn’t dislike Bea because she was promiscuous, but he wasn’t sure that was true. It wasn’t something Ethan was proud of or anything, but he’d rather not interact with her if he didn’t have to. Looking down into Alanna’s pale blue eyes, which blazed with anger, he decided he was going to have to. How do I get myself into these things? he wondered, sighing inwardly. And how’d I get cursed with even more pushy female relatives!?

---

Bea adjusted her camera, settling it more securely atop the tripod. The night before had been so cold that the fountain water had frozen in perfect, icy falls. It was still cold, cold enough that she shook, and her fingers burned. I don’t care, she thought, I just want to get this shot. She was still upset, even though Sydney had called her and apologized. She’d sounded so sincere that Bea had forgiven her. But I don’t have to forgive her obnoxious prick of a brother! she thought, glowering through the camera.

She’d been angry before, but never like this. Who the hell does he think he is? she fumed. Comparing himself to Gabriel! Hmmph! Never in a million years could he hope to be as good a man as Gabriel Wolfe! Bea pulled away from the camera with a frustrated growl. There was no way she could get this shot if she couldn’t calm down. Grumbling beneath her breath, she settled down on the bench surrounding the fountain, keeping a close eye on her camera.

“Bea?”

Don’t turn around, she told herself, taking a deep breath. If you turn around, you will claw out his eyes. She recognized Ethan’s voice, although she couldn’t fathom why he was here or how he’d known where she would be. Alanna had been the only person she’d told. Of course, Bea thought, rising slowly. That’s what I get for sticking my nose in with her and Drake. Fair’s fair, I suppose. She walked over to her camera before turning to face Ethan.

Why did the Wolfe men have to be so good-looking? Oh, she supposed they could have been homely as could be, and still they wouldn’t lose their appeal. It was something in their eyes, in the way they smiled; that was the attraction. Even Ethan’s smile, which was hesitant and unsure. She was a little surprised to see that his hair was loosely braided and wondered if one of his sisters had gotten to him. I can see that, Bea thought, fighting a smile. I can just picture a younger Bailey using her brother for hairstyling practice.

“Um ... can we talk?” Ethan asked.

He looks like he thinks I’m about to tear his throat out with my teeth, Bea thought. Out loud she said, “About what?”

“I know you’re mad at me,” Ethan said quietly. “I uh ... probably shouldn’t have said ... what I said. So um ... I thought I’d...”

“Apologize?” Bea suggested, her eyebrows raising.

“Uh ... yeah...” Ethan answered, looking defeated.

Bea reached up and fiddled with her camera. She wasn’t sure if he really wanted to apologize, but she didn’t want to fight with him, either. It would have been nice to get along with him, she thought, taping her fingers against the hard casing of her camera. It would have been nice to ... well, I can dream on about that. Bea sighed inwardly and turned to look at him again. She wondered what ill fate Alanna had threatened him with.

“Look, I don’t want an insincere apology,” Bea told him. “If you’re only here because of something Alanna said, I’d rather you just go away.”

“I ... I’m not,” Ethan said, but he’d hesitated a moment too long before he spoke.

Bea rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Go away, Ethan.”

She stepped behind her camera again and readjusted it, focusing it once more on the fountain. Unfortunately, Ethan was in the line of her shot. Bea pulled back and narrowed her eyes on him until he moved out of her way. He didn’t leave, though. What is he doing? she wondered. Glancing sidelong at him, she saw him studying her curiously. Trying to ignore him, she started taking her pictures of the fountain. Bea liked to use the tripod for level shots, but she removed it to get shots from a lower vantage and from different angles.

She couldn’t explain exactly what it was she loved so dearly about photography. People who didn’t love it didn’t tend to understand. This was for a project she was putting together, but often Bea took photos to Alanna. Black and whites became drawings and color shots became paintings. Sometimes if she found something compelling enough to shoot, she brought it to Quinn.

“Look,” Ethan began again. “I really am sorry ... I mean, your personal life is none of my business...”

“Personal life?” Bea muttered through gritted teeth.

“You understand, it’s just something I don’t want my little sister involved in,” Ethan went on. “There must be something I can do...”

Fed up, Bea whirled to face him. “You want to know what you can do!?” she snapped. “You can get your head out of your ass!”

He stared at her, stunned. Bea grabbed her camera case from where she’d left it and secured her camera. She was so angry her hands were shaking. The tripod was collapsible, so she folded it up until it was small enough to settle against her shoulder. I cannot believe he’s related to the Wolfes, she thought. He’s supposed to be one of them, but ... Bea shouldered her camera case as well, then turned to give Ethan a last, long look.

“It’s easy for you,” she said, shaking her head. “You sleep around and society says you’re a man! Me? I sleep with a few people and I’m the town whore.”

She left him standing near the fountain. I don’t care what he thinks anymore, she thought, as she headed for her car. He can go find himself a sweet, docile little Catholic woman who wants to wait until she’s married. Bea knew that wasn’t really fair; some of her best friends had waited a long time before getting involved with men. Not that you can really blame them, she thought, scowling. It only takes one time. Spread your legs once and bam! Insta-Slut.

She’d been stupid enough to get herself entangled much too young. It seemed like the younger you are, the quicker the rumors began. Good news travels fast, after all, Bea thought wryly. She hadn’t even been like those other girls, who had a new boyfriend every week that they were “so in love” with. But she was the one who’d been branded a slut. It seems like I just can’t escape that, Bea thought, as she placed her camera case and tripod in the safety net in the trunk of her car. No matter what I do or where I go, I can’t escape it.

---

Well, I tried, Ethan thought, as he made his way up the steps like a man going to his execution. She can’t say I didn’t try. Bea couldn’t have been more than five foot three. She was tiny, he towered over her, but he’d felt three feet tall when she’d spoken to him. Even his sisters couldn’t make him feel like that much of a slimeball. And now, if I’m lucky, Alanna will only break half the bones in my body, Ethan thought wryly. He stepped into the living room and was quickly engulfed by warmth and chattering voices.

His fight or flight instincts nearly kicked in. Alanna and Drake were sitting on the couch, Xandri and Quinn in their usual armchair, and Sada was on the loveseat, though she was lying more on Alastair than on it. They all went silent when he stepped into the living room, turning to look at him curiously. Now I know how a deer feels, Ethan thought, taking a cautious step forward.

“How’d it go?” Alanna asked, her voice chilly.

“Um ... she told me to get my head out of my ass,” Ethan told her, grimacing.

Alanna grinned and spoke above the laughter of the rest of them. “She’s very honest, isn’t she? I told you she’d know it if you weren’t sincere.”

“I tried to be sincere,” Ethan said, sighing. “I really do feel bad that I upset her...”

“I don’t know what your problem is,” Alanna said, “but Bea is a great person. She doesn’t deserve your attitude.”

My attitude!? he thought, frowning. She’s the one who told me to get my head out of my ass! Even Andrea had never left him this confused and uncertain, and that was really saying something. Alanna seemed satisfied that he’d been told off, though. She scooted over a bit and patted the couch seat next to her. Ethan settled on the end of the couch, feeling uncomfortable with her and Drake snuggling so close by. How do you find relationships so wonderful as these?

He listened to them, keeping silent, as they talked about going bowling. Sada and Alastair got into an argument that she eventually won, when Quinn told his brother he was being unreasonable. She did promise to be careful, which seemed to soothe Alastair somewhat. I can understand why Syn and Eli like being here, Ethan thought, smiling to himself. He felt like such an outsider among them, though. They’d been nothing but warm and kind but...

“We need a fourth couple,” Xandri was saying. “That would make it more interesting.”

“Syn and Eli have homework,” Alanna said. “And Mom and Dad ... could you picture Dad bowling?”

Quinn snorted. “Not where anyone could see him.”

“You should talk,” Xandri teased. She turned mischievous blue eyes on the rest of them. “You won’t believe what I had to do to convince him to go!”

“We don’t want to know!” Alanna exclaimed, laughing.

A fourth couple, huh? Ethan mused, pursing his lips. Well, maybe... Well, maybe ‘couple’ was a bad word. But if some friends wanted to go bowling together, that would be all right, wouldn’t it? It wasn’t often that he was really friends with anyone. For as long as he could remember, he’d been taking care of his siblings, then his patients. Ethan had never had time before for friends, although he had more now, now that the rest of his family was not under his own roof. It couldn’t hurt to try, he decided, rising from the couch.

“I’ve got an idea,” he explained, at the curious looks. “I’ll be back in a moment.” He started heading for the kitchen, then paused and looked back over his shoulder. “I forgot... I need Bea’s phone number.”

---

The pictures were hung in the darkroom, so there was nothing else to do. Bea wandered out into the living room and closed the door behind her. Technically her ‘dark room’ was supposed to be a bedroom, but she had no bed, so it served a different purpose. She kept her clothing in battered old suitcases, where they could at least be neatly folded. Could be worse, Bea told herself for the millionth time, as she padded into the kitchen. A mini-fridge sat on top of a very rickety old table, and a garbage bag in the corner was filled with plastic cups, paper plates, and plastic silverware.

There wasn’t spare money for anything else; there never had been. She’d been living in this broken-down hole in the wall since she was fifteen. The sleazy landlord hadn’t cared that she was only fifteen, as long as she could pay. And Bea imagined he would have taken payment other than money, but she would rather have slept on the street. It’s a disgusting hole, and I only pay three hundred a month, she thought, but damnit, I’m proud that I’ve managed this much.

Bea took some leftover pizza from the fridge, pulled off the saran wrap to eat it cold. She grabbed her latest book-Real Ghost, Restless Spirits, and Haunted Places, by Brad Steiger-and headed towards the couch. It was as battered as the rest of the things she owned and not terribly comfortable to sleep on, but she did every night. The only things Bea owned that were nice were her camera and her clothing. And my new camcorder, she reminded herself.

The phone rang then, startling her. It was a cell phone, and it played Nine Inch Nails; Bea loved the reactions when people realized that ‘Closer’ was playing on her cell phone. The ID indicated that it was from the Wolfe house, so she figured it must have been Alanna.

“Hey, sexy,” Bea teased when she picked up the phone.

The voice that answered was most certainly not Alanna’s. “Um ... Bea ... this is Ethan, actually...”

“Works well enough,” Bea said cheerfully. Far be it from me to hold back, just so he’ll feel safer, she thought.

“Anyway,” Ethan said, clearing his throat. “Look, this might sound a little odd but ... well, you see...”

She listened, her eyebrows raised, as he explained about bowling. They need another couple, she thought, and he wants me to go with ... him? Oh, Bea knew Ethan didn’t mean that they go as a couple-type couple. He wanted to go as friends. Well, I’ll give him this much, she thought, unless a man is a good bowler, he wouldn’t offer to do this unless he was really sorry. Still, she wanted to be sure.

“Put Lonnie on the phone for a moment,” Bea said.

There was crackling and a soft clack, as the phone was sent down. She could hear, very faintly, voices talking in the background. Then there was a faint scraping of plastic on wood as the phone was scooped up again.

“Something wrong, Bea?” Alanna asked. Her voice was light and teasing.

Bea snorted. “Did you put him up to this, Lonnie? Because if you did...”

“I didn’t,” Alanna assured her. “He came up with it all on his own. It’s a good sign, I think. I was asking Syn earlier if she thought Ethan would like to go bowling with us...” She giggled. “Her eyes got all wide and she was like ‘I don’t really think so... ‘.”

“All right, put him back on the phone,” Bea sighed.

“Did you really tell him to get his head out of his ass?” Alanna asked. “Damn, I wish I hadn’t missed that.”

“Lonnie...” Bea said warningly.

Her friend’s soft giggling was the only answer she got. Alanna was a real mischief maker, just as meddling and nosy as she was, if not more so. At least I know she won’t be asking him if he masturbates, Bea thought, grinning. Maybe I’ll do that sometime, just to shut him up.

“Bea?” Ethan again.

“I’ll go,” Bea told him. “But don’t think I fully believe that you’re sincere just yet. I know how scary Alanna can be.”

Ethan actually laughed. “Fair enough,” he said. “Oh, um ... I was kind of wondering if I could see some of your work sometime. I didn’t think about it earlier but ... I’ve seen some of Xandri’s, I’d like to see yours, too.”

“Oh ... okay,” Bea said quietly.

That had caught her off guard. She was feeling confused when she hung up the phone. Did I agree to go on a group date with him? she wondered, frowning. I mean, it’s a ‘just friends’ thing but ... Ugh, there was nothing worse than hanging around lovey-dovey couples. At least we’ll be bowling, Bea thought, letting her phone fall down onto the couch beside her. Maybe that won’t leave too much time for snuggling.

Chapter 4: Guys vs. Girls

Chase propped his feet up on the coffee table and watched his brother Ethan, fighting back laughter. I haven’t seen him in this much of a frenzy since he went to prom with Andrea, he thought, shaking his head. I think life is about to become infinitely more entertaining. He didn’t really think he liked this town too much. It was boring, as far as he was concerned. The only upside, as far as Chase was concerned, was that he’d found a rock-climbing gym that had actually been willing to hire him.

“I can’t believe you’re going on a date with Bea,” Chase said, grinning. “Man, is she ever hot!”

“It isn’t a date,” Ethan insisted, for the thousandth time.

No? Chase thought. Then why are you preening like a vain peacock? Ethan was the only man he’d ever met who brushed his hair until it was as fine and silky as a woman’s. Himself, he usually just ran his fingers through his hair and left it at that. His brother came back into the living room and dropped down onto the couch to lace up his boots. Chase didn’t quail beneath Ethan’s glare, but he did take his feet down off the coffee table.

“She is hot, though,” Chase went on, grinning. “I love redheads. And damn, those breasts ... ow!”

Scowling, he rubbed the back of his head where Ethan had smacked him. Oh, no, you’re not attracted to her, not at all, Chase thought, glaring at his brother. This is the worst case of denial I’ve ever seen. Ethan was good at that. He could block off his feelings so effectively that he didn’t realize he had them. Personally, Chase liked to make his feelings known. He was outgoing and he preferred outgoing people, like Bea.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” Ethan grumbled, rising from the couch. “I hate bowling.”

“It’s got some perks, though,” Chase said, putting his feet up on the table. “Your date is hot and from all I’ve heard, rather willing.”

“Chase, you’re a pig,” Ethan said, turning to face him. “You know what? I curse you.”

Chase’s eyebrows rose. “Curse me?”

“Yes,” Ethan said, turning to grab his coat. “I curse you. You’re going to find the sweetest, shyest girl you’ve ever met and fall madly in love with her.” He paused a minute as he pulled his coat on, then added, “And she won’t sleep with you for months. No, no, even better, years.”

“Oh, I’m so scared!” Chase rolled his eyes. “My big brother has cursed me, whooo, frightening. Will you be making a Chase voodoo doll, too?”

He tossed his head back, laughing. Curse, Chase thought, that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Why would he ever fall for a girl who was sweet and shy when he couldn’t stand that type of girl? And for that matter, where the heck would he find one? When Chase did hang out with girls, they were the partying type, like him. There weren’t a lot of delicate Catholic girls showing up at clubs. Still...

“Take that back, Ethan,” Chase called. “At least the years part, man. That’s harsh. Ethan? Ethan!”

---

Ethan had agreed to meet the others at the bowling alley. It was pleasantly warm inside. He shrugged his coat off as he moved down the length of the alley, looking for everyone else. Alastair and Quinn, who tended to tower above everyone else, really stood out in the crowd. They were all at the rental desk, getting bowling shoes. I hate bowling shoes, Ethan thought, scowling. I hate bowling! He really should have thought this through a little better.

“There you are!” Alanna called when she spotted him. She waved, beckoning him over. “Come on, slow poke!”

I feel sorry for the owner of this bowling alley, Ethan thought, as he approached. Eight of them total, most of them born Wolfes or married into the family. That was even worse than him and all his siblings. It kind of reminds me of all my siblings, he thought, smiling slightly. Quinn is like Gavin and Alastair is kind of like Chase, although less of a pig. And Alanna reminds me of Bailey a little... And where was Bea? He looked around and finally found her.

Whoa, he thought, his breath catching in his throat. She smiled at him when she saw him, then turned back to Alanna with a toss of her head. Damn Chase, Ethan thought, putting ideas into his head. She looks so ... Bea wore a thigh-length dress of a jade near the same color of her eyes, with a short jean jacket over it. Usually he thought boots of the heeled, knee-high type were kind of ... well, slutty, but they looked good on her. There was something about Bea that made her look sophisticated no matter what she was wearing.

“I hate bowling shoes,” Bea said when he stopped beside her. “It sucks when you’ve got size six feet.”

“It’s worse when you need a size thirteen,” Ethan assured her.

Bea’s eyebrows rose. “Well, well, big feet,” she teased, smiling. “You know what they say about men with big feet...”

He blushed like a thirteen-year-old that was hitting the first rough spots of puberty. The smile she gave him was wickedly teasing, but he felt on some level that he deserved it. Carrying his shoes, Ethan followed Bea and the others to a set of lanes down at the very end of the alley. He found himself watching her as she removed her boots, as she leaned over to tie her bowling shoes. There is nothing wrong with thinking that she’s pretty, he told himself, as long as I don’t start acting like Chase.

“So, how are we going to do this, anyway?” Alastair asked. “Two teams, four, what?”

“I think we should play men versus women,” Alanna said, smiling mischievously.

Quinn snorted softly. “That wouldn’t be fair. We’d crush you.”

“Stay away from the snack bar, Quinn,” Bea said as she took a seat to set up a scorekeeper. “You’ll be needing plenty of room later for when you eat your words.”

That was how Ethan found himself as one of the guys, sitting on the bench to await his turn. Alastair had set it up in alphabetical order, so that he went first, then Drake, then Ethan, and Quinn last. Alanna followed suit, so at least he didn’t have to worry about being opposite Bea in the lineup. I can’t remember the last time he went bowling, he thought, as he watched Alastair. Ouch ... something tells me Alastair doesn’t remember, either. He did hit the pins in the end, though, so it wasn’t all bad.

Of the guys, Quinn was the best. He had a surprising amount of patience and perfect aim. Ethan found himself staring when he got a strike on his first ball. He’d always thought of Quinn as patient and focused when he wanted to be, but he hadn’t expected that. For himself, he did well enough. Of the girls, Bea did better than the others, but she wasn’t as good as Quinn.

“What was that supposed to be?” Quinn asked Xandri, after she got two gutter balls in a row.

She just stuck her tongue out at him. Drake did much the same when he got a gutter ball, except he directed it at his own teammates, who were hooting loudly. Ethan made certain to be careful, because the girls laughed even louder than the guys. He tried to copy Quinn’s patient method, but he wasn’t quite nearly successful. For his fifth frame, he ended up with an eight, which wasn’t too bad, considering that Alanna had only gotten three for her sixth frame.

“Come on, Bea!” Alanna called, as the redhead stood up for her sixth frame. “Get us a strike!”

“You’re gonna need it!” Alastair teased. “Right, guys?”

Ethan smiled. “No way, man. I’m not saying anything to risk making her angry while she’s holding a bowling ball.”

Bea, who’d been getting ready to send her ball down the lane, paused to laugh. She almost dropped the ball. Those soft jade eyes focused on him, and she smiled. Ethan watched her as she turned back to the lane and leaned over slightly to roll the ball down the aisle. Girls shouldn’t bowl in skirts like that, he thought, uncomfortably aware that he was staring. Although maybe she has the right idea ... Even Drake was watching, although he at least tried to be covert about it.

The girls rose, cheering, when Bea got a strike. Laughing, she turned to head back to her seat, tossing her hair back over her shoulder.

“See, Alastair?” Bea teased, grinning. “Don’t get too confident yet.”

---

“Quinn Wolfe, you get that smug look off your face!”

Bea grinned. She sat down at one of the tables near their lane and set down the food basket and soda can she was holding. Ethan, who was sitting in the chair next to her, looked up. He was watching her, his expression oddly thoughtful, as she slid into her seat. She pulled back the wax paper covering her sandwich and licked her lips. The Philly cheese steak sandwich was huge and rather greasy, but it always tasted great. Bea hefted half of it out of the basket and took a bite.

“I haven’t had one of those in years,” Ethan said. He was smiling as he handed her a napkin. “Greasy enough?”

“Oh, it’s perfect,” Bea assured him, wiping her fingers on a napkin. “Want some?” When he opened his mouth to protest, she shook her head. “Don’t even. This thing is huge, I’ll never finish it on my own.”

Ethan hesitated for a moment, then grinned. “You know what? Sounds good to me ... pass me back some of those napkins.”

As the losing team, the girls were paying for dinner. Ethan had refused to get anything, though, when she’d offered. It’s kind of cute, actually, Bea thought, watching him as he picked up the other half of the sandwich. I think he was trying to be chivalrous. And he also tried to be neat, but that was near impossible. The sandwich was far too big and greasy. Surprisingly enough, Ethan just laughed it off when he dropped it softly in his lap. I like the way he laughs, Bea decided, smiling at him.

She was so busy watching him that she was startled when he reached out with a napkin and wiped the side of her mouth. Flushing and laughing herself, she set the sandwich down and grabbed a napkin of her own.

“You know, Bea,” Ethan said quietly, “there was no need to feed the table, too. It didn’t beat you.”

For a moment she didn’t realize that he was teasing. Bea glanced at the tabletop and saw that it was covered in crumbs. Grinning, she reached up and tweaked his nose, startling another laugh from him. It was then that she realized that the others were staring at them. Ethan, at least, was happily oblivious to that.

“I vote no bowling next time,” Xandri said. She sat on Quinn’s lap, as usual, and she was fiddling with her fries. “I don’t think I like bowling.”

Quinn laughed. “It was your idea, little Xandri,” he reminded her.

“We could go mini-golfing next time,” Alanna suggested. “Or, well, when it warms up a bit.”

“By then I’ll be too pregnant to reach down and retrieve my ball,” Sada complained, pouting.

“Then I’ll get it for you,” Alastair said, leaning over and nuzzling his lips against her neck.

Oh god, Bea thought, sinking down in her chair. We were safe while we were bowling, but now they’re getting all mushy. Not that she wasn’t happy for Sada; she would have expected Alastair to say no to the mini-golf, even though it was such a mild game. She was just getting uncomfortable now, and Ethan was no longer quite so oblivious. At least I don’t have to feel like a seventh wheel all by my lonesome this time, Bea thought, sighing inwardly.

They had to deal with it until dinner was eaten and their shoes were returned. She was pulling on her coat, wondering how she would tolerate Alanna and Drake on the ride home. I should have driven myself, Bea thought, scowling. She adored her friends, truly, but they were in a very annoying lovey-dovey mood.

“You ready, Bea?” Alanna asked. She had her arms around Drake and was holding him tight.

She hesitated a moment too long, but Ethan stepped in for her. “I’ll take her home,” he offered. When they all turned to look at him, he shrugged. “We’re friends, aren’t we?”

Bea smiled and nodded. She said her good-byes, hugging Alanna and Drake, before following Ethan out into the cold night. Why did he offer to take me home? she wondered. Even if he does want to be friends ... She was surprised that he drove such a small car, too. It was a silver Mazda 4, a nice little car--little being the operative word. Maybe I’m just used to the Wolfe men and their giant motorcycles, Bea thought, as she slipped into the passengers’ seat. Quinn is the only one sane enough to want doors and windows.

Apparently, Ethan liked them, too, although Sydney said he did ride if it was warm enough. It wasn’t like Gabriel or Alastair, who rode their motorcycles even in the dead of winter. Bea was happy to have heat, though. The heat made her sleepy, although she was already tired. She listened to the music, her eyes half-closed, speaking only to give Ethan directions. I’m just not sure what to say to him, she thought. And he said very little until he had pulled up in front of her apartment building.

“Thank you,” Bea said quietly. “I appreciate it...”

“I figured I wouldn’t leave you to the fate of driving home with two mushy lovebirds,” Ethan said, his voice gently teasing.

Bea grinned. “My hero.”

A sudden boldness seized her. She leaned over and kissed him gently on the cheek. Ethan was staring at her, stunned, as she climbed out of the car. Bea waved to him, then headed up the stairs to her apartment. She paused outside the door, hesitating; her ragged home didn’t seem so welcoming all of a sudden. But she went in anyway, and the wonderful evening faded behind her. When I’m with them, I feel like a real person, she thought, as she dropped onto the couch. In here, I go back to being Bea, unloved, unwanted ... Bea the Whore.

---

“Hey, welcome back, bro!”

Great, Ethan thought, just great. Chase was still sitting on his couch, feet up on the table, watching T.V. His brother picked up the remote and turned it off when he walked in. Oh, he loved his siblings, but sometimes they were overbearing, especially when he desperately needed to be alone. Ethan pulled his coat off and held it in front of him, draped over his arms. He’d thought of Bea the whole way home ... and his thoughts had gotten a little out of control.

“What are you still doing here?” Ethan asked.

“Waiting,” Chase explained. “I want you to take back that part of your curse. You know, the years thing.”

Ethan rolled his eyes. “I was only kidding. Now get out of here, I’m tired.”

“Did she wear you out that much?” Chase called after him as he headed towards her bedroom.

“Screw off, Chase!” Ethan snapped.

He slammed the door of his room shut behind him, tossed his coat away, and dropped down onto his bed. Ethan waited, barely breathing, until he heard the door of his apartment close. He let out a breath of relief when his brother was finally gone. What has gotten into me? he wondered. And what am I going to do? His body ached, so hard that it was painful. Ethan had thought first of that small kiss she’d given him, such a chaste little thing, and before he’d realized it, he’d been thinking about how it would feel to have her moving beneath him.

He had not experienced attraction like this in ... well, ever. Even Andrea had never made him hunger like this. Ethan found himself looking around his room, as if he thought someone might catch him as he opened his jeans. He swore he’d never get involved with another woman like that, but his body couldn’t stand this. When he closed his eyes, it was Bea he saw in his mind. Ethan could almost feel her mouth on his skin, that small, chaste kiss.

His own hand eased his arousal, but it was not what his body wanted. The image of her, stretched out beneath him, came to him again. In his mind, she was still wearing her dress, the skirt pushed up around her hips. Ethan let out a gasp, half-pleasure, half-surprise, as hot come sprayed across his hand and speckled his belly. Yuck, he thought, grimacing. Ugh, maybe I should have just taken a cold shower. Yet he wasn’t sure if even that would cool his fire.

He would just have to find a way to control himself, because nothing could come of this attraction. It was nothing but lust; there was no reason to give in to it. I don’t know her, Ethan thought, and I don’t love her. He was getting up to wash himself off when his phone rang, and he picked it up.

“Ethan?” The soft voice was Bea’s.

“Oh, uh ... hi,” Ethan stammered. She sounded sleepy, her voice husky, and it made his body stir once more.

“I’m sorry to disturb you,” Bea said. “I just ... wanted to thank you for inviting me. I had a lot of fun.”

“Me too,” Ethan told her, and he found himself smiling. “See ... I was sincere. I bowl like a dork.”

Bea laughed. “Yes, I accept your apology.”

They didn’t talk much longer than that. When she said goodnight, though, Ethan kind of wished he could come up with an excuse to keep talking. She was smart and witty, and he really would have liked to be friends with her. Shower first, he thought, wrinkling his nose. Now he was sticky. If Ethan was going to be friends with Bea, he definitely had to get this under control first.

Chapter 5: Pictures

With her camera case on her shoulder, bumping lightly against her hip, and a photo box in her arms, Bea made her way down the hill behind the group home. Snow crunched beneath her feet; it was up to her knees, but that wasn’t going to stop her. It’s almost the middle of March, she thought, sighing. I can’t wait until it starts to warm up. She could see Ethan down in the paddock, standing still while Aria and Spots circled around him. Bea was glad to have the chance to go see him and Aria. She’d found something she thought the little girl might like.

She stepped up onto the fence to watch, but she wasn’t standing there long before Aria noticed her. The little girl let out a squeal of delight and turned the pony’s head, steering it towards the fence. Ethan turned and smiled when he saw her. He followed Aria, and when he reached the girl’s side, he placed a hand on her back. The movement was subtle, but Bea saw it for the protective gesture it was. He probably drives her crazy, she thought, but I bet she’s never had to worry about falling when he’s around.

“Bea!” Aria said cheerfully. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to see you,” Bea told her, smiling. “I brought some of my pictures with me.”

Aria cheered. Laughing softly, Bea climbed between the fence rails. She struggled in the knee-deep snow, nearly falling, but strong hands caught her, keeping her upright. Surprised, she looked up at Ethan. He was so tall that the snow was hardly a deterrent to him. I never before understood that whole thing in romance novels, Bea thought, where the hero makes the heroine feel all small and feminine. Granted, she generally felt rather small around the Wolfe men, but this was different somehow.

“Careful,” Ethan said quietly. “You could have waited for us inside, you know. We weren’t going to be much longer.”

Bea shrugged. “I figured I’d help you,” she explained, reaching for the other side of Spots’ bridle. “It’s cold ... I thought the work would go faster with two of us...”

“True,” Ethan agreed, smiling. “Come on, Ari, it’s past time we went inside.”

“Awwww,” Aria whined. She stuck out her lower lip in a pout for a moment, then her eyes lit up with mischief and she began looking between the two of them. “Ethan said you all went bowling together. So was that your first date?”

My, she is quite the troublemaker, Bea thought, fighting a smile. Aria was adorable, but she was going to be a terrible gossip in a few years. Assuming she ever got to be in a public school. She got the feeling that Ethan would adopt the girl if he could. As it was, he blustered out an answer, trying to explain--apparently not for the first time--that it had been a group thing and he and Bea were just friends. So your cheeks are red from the cold, Bea thought, right?

Aria turned her attention to Bea then. “Has he kissed you yet?” she asked.

“Um ... well ... I uh...” Bea stammered. It was her turn to blush. “Friends don’t kiss, sweetie.”

“Ari, you’re being nosy,” Ethan warned.

“But I want to know!” Aria complained. “Bea’s really pretty, you said so yourself!”

Ethan quieted and looked away. Bea stared at him, her eyebrows raised. Aria continued looking back and forth between the two of them, grinning broadly. The silence was palpable, interrupted only by the creak of rails as he pushed the barn door open. Gee, I wish I could make him squirm like that, Bea thought, fighting a smile. Or maybe perhaps writhe would be a better word for it... Really, it wasn’t appropriate thoughts for the moment, but she couldn’t help herself.

Bea set down her photo box and camera case on the tack box next to Aria, then helped Ethan with the pony. She’d never really liked horses all that much; they were big, powerful, scary animals. But the pony was small and calm, and she didn’t mind him so much. Maybe it’s time to get over my fear of big, powerful animals, Bea thought, glancing over the pony’s bag at Ethan, who was brushing the shaggy brown and white coat. But how could I convince him?

“So, what kind of pictures did you bring?” Aria asked when Ethan picked her up and started carrying her from the barn.

“Well, one year I got a job as a photographer for the Triple Crown,” Bea explained. “It was great, even if horses terrify the living daylights out of me! I got the opportunity to get a lot of great shots.”

Aria let out another earsplitting shriek of delight. Laughing, Bea handed the photo box to her, allowing her to hold it. She talked excitedly the whole way up the hill and into the group home, the whole time Ethan helped her out of coat, mittens, scarf, hat, and boots. Bea was removing her own coat when Ethan caught her eye and smiled at her. He rolled his eyes, too, but the expression was good-natured and amused. If he’s trying to make me like him, she thought, it’s working.

“Why don’t you take Ari down to her room before she bursts?” Ethan suggested, gently shifting the girl into Bea’s arms. “I’ll go get some hot cocoa.”

Aria was heavier than Bea would have anticipated, by the easy way Ethan carried her. She struggled down the hall and was relieved to find the door to the girl’s room wide open. With a sigh, she set Aria down on the bed, then settled herself at the other end. The box was full of pictures, most of them horse ones, but there was a packet at the end that she’d brought for Ethan. They were pictures she had reprinted and restored from older negatives, ones she’d wanted to share with him.

Gabriel gave these to me, Bea thought, setting the packet aside. There were pictures of him and Aislinn, more than twenty years younger, of Quinn, Alastair, and Alanna as babies and young children. When she’d asked, Gabriel had said that he figured she’d enjoy making her own copies, which was why he’d given her the negatives. Sometimes Bea looked through them and pretended they were really her own family. Maybe someday I will have a family, she thought, as she settled down with Aria. Just not this one.

---

“Something wrong, Ethan?”

Ethan looked up at Jill. He was toying with miniature marshmallows as he waited for the water to boil. Everything is wrong, he thought, sighing. My whole world is being turned upside down. He couldn’t really tell her that, though. From everything he’d heard, Bea was supposed to be this worldly, promiscuous woman, but his interaction with her was always innocent and ... sweet. Ethan found himself wishing he knew more about her, so he could understand her better.

“Not at all,” he answered, flashing Jill a smile. “Just thawing out, you know...”

“That girl who was with you,” Jill began, as she took the kettle off the stove. “Who is she? Friend of yours?”

“I uh ... I guess so,” Ethan replied, shrugging. “I mean, she’s a friend of my cousins’ and she helped me out ... Ari’s birthday, you know. I suppose that makes us friends...”

Jill laughed softly. “You sound like a fifteen-year-old whose parents caught him kissing his girlfriend while they were supposed to be studying.”

Ethan shifted uncomfortably. When did everyone in the world become more perceptive about how I’m feeling than I am? he wondered, frowning. He took charge of the steaming mugs of hot cocoa, first pouring cream into them, then dropping in marshmallows. Oh, he’d never been the type to believe in love at first sight, and that hadn’t changed any, but Ethan was still reminded strongly of how it had been with Andrea. He’d liked her from the very first time she smiled at him.

Balancing the tray carefully with both hands, he made his way down the hall to Aria’s room. Ethan peeked inside and smiled when he saw them sitting together on the bed, flipping through a stack of pictures. Bea spoke in a soft, patient tone as she related a story to the little girl. Something about the Kentucky Derby, that first time she’d been taking photos of the racehorses.

“And they’re really big and high-strung, of course,” Bea was saying. “So when this one bolted, it nearly ran me over!”

Aria’s eyes were round in astonishment. “What happened?”

“Well, they caught the horse,” Bea told her. “And once they were sure their precious racehorse didn’t hurt itself, they came back to make sure I was okay.”

“Racehorses are very expensive,” Aria said solemnly. “I’m going to ride racehorses one day, right, Ethan?”

Ethan used the hot cocoa as an excuse to hold off on his answer. Aria might walk someday, but the chances of her riding racehorses were slim. It wasn’t that he didn’t think she would be strong enough, because the little girl got stronger every day. Where would she learn to ride racehorses? he wondered. Spots is a far cry from a Thoroughbred. And they were too far from any place that would train them. Not to mention that learning to ride horses, rather than a loaned pony, was going to be expensive.

“You know,” Bea began, before he got the chance to answer. “Sometimes we find ourselves doing things we never expected. At your age, I would have never thought I’d be a photographer.”

“Really?” Aria asked. “What did you want to do?”

Bea laughed. “Oh, it’s nothing ... something stupid...”

“Tell us,” Ethan insisted, as he took a seat at the end of the bed.

He smiled at her, a little teasingly, unable to help himself. Bea’s return smile was surprisingly shy. She fidgeted uncomfortably, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. The movement was so ... human. Ethan had seen her angry, he’d seen her confident, but this was the first time he was getting to see the part of her that wasn’t perfectly at ease with herself.

“I um ... I wanted to be ... to be a model...” Bea said, looking away. A sheepish smile touched her lips. “It was so ... stupid. I’ve never had the height ... I’ve never been thin enough or pretty enough.”

“Models aren’t pretty,” Aria said stubbornly. “Jill is always looking at pictures of runway models, but they all have faces like this.” Aria sucked her cheeks in and puckered up her lips like she’d been sucking on a lemon. “And they have no boobies. Right, Ethan?”

Sputtering, he set his mug aside on the table so he wouldn’t spill hot cocoa all over the place. It was a close thing, because he was coughing and laughing so hard that his whole body shook. Bea joined him in his laughter, but Aria apparently didn’t understand what was so funny, because she was staring at them in confusion. The little girl pushed her hair away from her face and smiled, as though trying to see the joke. In the end, she gave up trying.

“Adults are weird!” Aria huffed, folding her arms across her chest.

They had finally managed to stop laughing, but that set them off again. Bea leaned against his shoulder, trying to stifle her laughter against her hands. Groaning, Ethan leaned back against the wall and ran his fingers back through his hair. “I think I got hot cocoa up my nose,” he thought, rubbing at his nose. “I really should be used to it when she says things like that.”

“Out of the mouths of babes,” Ethan panted, still chuckling.

“Talk to Aislinn sometime,” Bea told him. “Alastair was much worse than that as a kid, apparently, and at a much younger age.”

Aria rolled her eyes. “Would you two stop acting silly? I want Bea to tell me more stories!”

So that was what they did. Bea allowed Aria to pick out the pictures she liked the most, and the little girl had nearly half the box sitting on her night table by the time they were finished. One of them, a picture of a beautiful stallion with a coat that shined like copper, Aria proclaimed as her favorite. Bea told her she would do something special with the picture and bring it back soon.

Ethan finally managed to get Bea away when Aria’s eyelids began drooping. He tucked the little girl in and cleared the mugs out, bringing them to the kitchen. When he came out again, Bea was pulling on her coat. She flashed him a sweet smile, and he found himself pulling on his coat and walking her out to the parking lot. She was wonderful with Aria today, Ethan thought, glancing at her as they walked.

“It’s funny, you know,” Bea said suddenly. “I don’t usually like children much. I uh ... I guess I’ve never had the patience.” She glanced at him, smiling. “But she’s got so much spunk ... and courage. I just wanted to do something for her ... to encourage her, you know?”